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Flip flops

Some people love flip flops, but I've never found them particularly comfortable. All that changed yesterday. Two days ago I suddenly developed a rash on the back of my hands, that was soon to be seen on my feet, and then on my arms, stomach, legs, palms of my hands and soles of my feet. This rash is particularly itchy, and led to me not attending my quilting group yesterday, which is very unusual for me - that is my one time in the week that I regularly meet with friends and like-minded people.

The itching was so intense during the first night, that I made a doctor's appointment, and went to see the local pharmacist, who advised me to try to get a doctor's appointment that day - which is what I did. With intense itching and wheezing and slightly laboured breathing, I saw the doctor. His response to the rash was not one that I had expected - "Fantastic" he said. From a medical point of view, to see such a reaction probably is quite a fascinating experience; at that point in time, I didn't see the experience as being particularly fantastic, however - it all adds to the GP's experience. The outcome of the appointment was that they think I have had an allergic response to insect bites I received a week ago, and have been prescribed POM antihistimines (the two over-the-counter types I'd already had yesterday hadn't done much before the appointment), and some steroids to help with the breathing.

Last night, in trying to sleep in the hope that sleeping would stop the itching, I seemed to spend most of the night awake, tossing, turning, scratching, itching, rubbing - trying to get some relief without disturbing the sleep of my husband or the dog. Eventually, around 4am I settled to sleep - the rest of the night it was my impression that as soon as I started drifting off to sleep, the itching would start again.

How does all this tie in with flip flops? Despite my discomfort, I decided to continue with most of my normal routine. In going out to the pharmacy and the doctor, I had to find shoes that were comfortable - and all the ones I have, cover the heel and most of the foot. This was a problem, as the shoes were irritating my already irritated skin. The only option that seemed logical was to buy some suitable footwear. In getting the grocery shopping, I looked at footwear - and flip-flops were the most obvious answer to my predicament. Oh, the comfort of putting on the flip-flops and being able to walk without irritation.

How many times do we flip-flop on our decisions? Do we see this as a failing on our part? I don't think that a 'flip-flop' on a decision is necessarily a bad thing. There are times when we make a decision in the heat of the moment. We shouldn't be afraid to go back on such a decision, if it turns out the decision was not particularly wise or fair. Other decisions are right at a point in time, and for a certain amount of time; when the decision or action become a burden or more trouble than the alternative, it is time to reverse the decision. Some people may argue that changing your mind or reversing a decision is a shortcoming on your part, or a sign of weakness. I maintain that it is not a sign of weakness, but a sign of strength - a sign that you are able to recognise when a decision has served its time, and needs to be reviewed; it is a sign that you are able to take responsibility for decisions, and take decisive actions relating to decisions you have made. Moreover - it shows that you are not going to let the opinions of others stop you from doing what you believe is right, fair and proper. This last one is particularly difficult for many of us - both young and old. We worry about the impression we give others, and what others will think of us for changing our minds. Very often, we spend too much time worrying about what others thinks of us and our actions, that we fail to do what is right for us. Certainly our decisions should not hurt others - but neither should decisions harm the decision-maker, simply because they are more concerned about other people.

I am not advocating being selfish or self-centred. I am very aware that many people will do things to help others out, without thinking of their own needs, or putting their own needs at the bottom of the pile. There are a couple of quotations that sum this up: "almost all of our unhappiness is the result of comparing ourselves with others", and "If you knew how little others think of you, you wouldn't worry about it" - this last one, I read it as how little time people spend thinking about you, rather than what they think about you. This is so difficult for young people - at least it was for me; how many times did I watch what I was doing, trying not to trip up or do or say something really silly, for fear lots of people would see and say something.

So - the message for today - no decision is ever final, neither is any failure. If something needs to change, then make the change - make the decision and situation work.

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